Why I Deleted All Social Media Permanently

     I had been talking about taking a huge step for months. It should not have been a huge step, but that is what it feels like for most people my age. I had to get out of a relationship that was turning toxic before it actually started messing with my head. I didn't just delete the app from my phone this time. It was time to cut the cord.

     On June 21, 2019, I deleted all of my social media accounts, including Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat.

     For me personally, each of these had become huge time wasters. I wasted hours of high school on Twitter and hours of college on Instagram simply checking out what everyone else was doing. But in addition to that, I had started to feel my heart drop with sadness every time I opened one of these apps, whether I was seeing friends hanging out without me or the cluttered news feed.

     My relationship with these apps was turning from healthy creativity to ugly desperation.

     I needed a cleanse. I told myself it was just for the second half of 2019, but I loved the benefits so much that it has continued through to the present day.

     Below are the actual screenshots from that glorious day when I freed myself from checking-social-media-and-posting-enough-about-my-life-to-sound-interesting-but-not-too-much-that-I-was-oversharing—a delicate balance for anyone, but I have to be especially careful not to wear masks as an Enneagram Three.

     These messages are what social media companies give you with when you remove yourself from the Internet...

     My response: "#Goodbye to you too @Twitter :) I'm not sorry to see me go. No one really needs you in their lives."

     My response: "Not sorry to see you go, Insta! I had started becoming jealous and sad because of you, and it was a negative road I am glad I chose not to keep going down."

     So, Madeline, what are these "benefits" you have seen of being off the grid for a year?

     Well, I am so glad you asked! Below are some of the lessons this permanent break taught me about my friendships, myself, and my time.

1. I learned how to have more genuine friendships. One of the things that people dislike about their high school or college years is the insincere, shallow arrangement of "friendships" they find themselves in. I got super lucky and had a friend text me just after I deleted social media to say she had just deleted two of her accounts as well. What a blessing to have a close friend coincidentally do the same thing on the same day as me!

     She and I both agreed that we would know our true friends by their willingness to text, call, FaceTime, or write letters to keep up with us as individuals. This year of no social media gave me more in-person quality time with those I loved, and it revealed who actually wants to be my friend for life and not just my "friend" on social media.

2. I learned that quitting and staying off isn't hard. While it might have been built up in my head as a big deal to permanently delete social media accounts (especially since I had not really heard of anyone doing that), quitting was not as hard as I thought. I still am on my phone or computer a good bit of the day right now, but that time is for catching up with individuals on the phone and hearing more details about their lives.

     I also still have "medias" that are less social and more for fun and record-keeping, such as Pinterest, Goodreads, Letterboxd, and this blog. On these, I do not have interactions with people as much as I have interactions with inspiration in the form of images, books, movies, or creating my own content. However, I have had no desire to jump back into Instagram, Twitter, or any Facebook-like social media; if I need to see a picture of someone or to figure out who someone is, there are hundreds of people who still have social media around me to help. ;)

3. I learned to enjoy more reading, meditating, adventures, privacy, and happiness. If I said that this last year was not the best of my college years, I would be lying to you. I have nearly completed my reading goal of 30 books for this year, even though it's only July.  I practiced meditation and yoga on my own time because I was not still scrolling through a feed. I had plenty of places to go on weekend trips and nowhere I had to post it. I had true friends in my life, and I put in the time and care to nurture those relationships, which deepened in person or pandemic-style over FaceTime. I still took pictures and videos, but they have been for my own enjoyment and for the enjoyment of those I specifically chose to text them to. To be honest, the experiences I have are so much richer because I do not have to tell the whole world about them.

     These are just three broad benefits of a choice I made last summer that has been truly life-changing for me.

     I cannot recommend this change enough if you find yourself being negatively impacted mentally or emotionally by anything you are seeing on social media.

     There are still ways to be "in the loop" with the news. There are still ways to catch up on pop culture and experience inspiring stories. There are still other ways to connect with friends—aren't handwritten letters better than memes anyway?

     If you have any questions about my time off social media or taking your own steps toward being off the grid, please comment below or (if you are receiving this post in your email) hit reply to this subscription!

~Madeline

P.S. If you liked this post, you may also like How I Stopped Negative, Repetitive Thoughts.